


Here's Where We Belong

by ChelseaStark_x



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Age Play, Age Play Caregiver Dean Winchester, Age Play Little Sam Winchester, Age Regression/De-Aging, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Bobby Singer, Bed-Wetting, Big Brother Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer Deals With Idjits, Brotherly Bonding, Brotherly Love, Caring Bobby Singer, Caring Castiel (Supernatural), Caring Dean Winchester, Cuddling & Snuggling, Cute, Daddy Dean, Dean Winchester Is Trying, Dean Winchester Takes Care of Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester is Protective of Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester is Sam Winchester's Parent, Family Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Healing Sam Winchester, Hurt Sam Winchester, I just love affectionate siblings sam & dean, Infantilism, Little Sam Winchester, Loving Dean Winchester, Non-Sexual Age Play, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Platonic Cuddling, Protective Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester is Loved, Sam Winchester is Not Okay, Sam Winchester is a Saint, Sharing a Bed, Sleepy Cuddles, This isn't a wincest fic, Though it can be interpreted as one, Tired Sam Winchester, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, it isn't, sam is mentally exhausted and just wants Dean to look after him
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2020-10-04 04:24:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20464976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChelseaStark_x/pseuds/ChelseaStark_x
Summary: Sam is mentally exhausted once Lucifer and Michael are finally put in the cage. He starts to regress, wants things to go back to how they were when he was younger, when Dean would take care of everything and Sam would follow. When Dean suggests they take a break and stay at one of Bobby's cabins, how will their relationship change?*Not intended to be a wincest fic, I just love affectionate Sam & Dean, so they cuddle even before the age play starts but nothing is sexual or romantic.*





	1. Your head is aching, I’ll make it better.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! So this is my first multi chapter fic in a while. I'll try to update regularly. If you have anything you want to see comment and let me know. Thanks for reading.

Sam Winchester loved to be taken care of. It was a simple fact of life, the sky was blue, grass was green, it’s impossible to hum whilst holding your nose and Sam loves to be taken care of. 

Considering how he was raised, moving from state to state, never staying in one place long enough to call it home, not making proper friends, it would be considered strange to some people that he would know what it felt like to be taken care of but when your brother was Dean Winchester, well it was impossible not to.

Dean had raised Sam since he was four. Sam knew this and he appreciated it so much more than Dean knew but sometimes he couldn’t help but wish that he was still that two year old kid that relied on Dean for everything. There were some days were he just wanted Dean to take over and control everything, whether it be when he ate, when he bathed, when he slept, Sam didn’t care, he just wanted Dean.

After everything they’d gone through, Lucifer _ finally _ away in his cage with Michael, he thought he deserved it. Not that he would ever admit to Dean what he was feeling, that’d be a good conversation _ ‘Hey Dean, yeah I’ve had enough of life as an adult, please treat me like a baby. _’ Yeah, no thanks. 

He knew he was already dependant on Dean, Hell he knew people thought they were too codependent and yeah they probably were but who could blame them? All their lives it had just been Sam and Dean, John Winchester was practically a stranger who uprooted them every other week when the hunt was over. 

The brothers had driven to another crappy motel after everything and decided they were taking a break from hunting, they deserved it more than anyone. Sam could tell Dean felt uneasy with this but still let them have the time off, all it took was one look towards his brother who looked exhausted and he’d agreed.

Sam woke up the next day and felt drained, relieved but drained. He wanted to do nothing but knew Dean would probably have them driving far away from this place, Sam thinks he recalls Dean saying something about one of Bobby’s old cabins but can’t remember, he had been half dead from the second they walked into the motel. 

If he thought his wish for Dean to take over was strong on a normal day, it was nothing compared to how he felt now. He felt years younger mentally, he felt the need to cry and whine at the exhaustion he felt. Wanted to raise his arms and just let Dean take care of him, when he was with Dean he knew he was safe. It was rare nowadays for them to cuddle but when they were younger Sam remembers climbing into Dean’s bed and getting the bests nights sleep. 

“Dude, you awake?” Sam heard Dean ask as well as the shuffling of the duffel bag that Dean had grabbed last night. Sam just let out a whine which caused Dean to raise an eyebrow, _ when was the last time he heard Sam whine? _

“You ok, Sammy?” Again Sam whined and buried his face further into the pillow. Maybe if he did, Dean would get the hint and just take over. Sam couldn’t stomach the thought of getting out of bed, yet alone being responsible for himself.

He felt rather than saw Dean sit down on the bed next to him and took a risk. They rarely hugged nowadays, only when something had gone wrong and they’d made it out somehow, so how would Dean react if Sam cuddled into him.

Before he could think himself out of it, Sam rolled over so that his head was resting on Dean’s lap. He felt his brother tense up and let out a small whine, not wanting to pull away but not wanting Dean to reject him in a way. He went to roll back over but stopped when he felt a hand run through his hair.

“Yeah, it’s been a long few months hey Sammy?” Dean asked, rhetorically of course but Sam nodded anyway. He was only slightly mortified when he felt tears build up in his eyes and was, yet again, so thankful that Dean was here. He wanted no one else to see him like this ever. Dean had seen Sam at his all time worst and still loved him.

Dean was looking down at his brother with a frown on his face. He remembered when Sam would come to him like this and cry silently into his big brothers shoulder after another argument with their dad. He remembered how he’d hold Sam, whispering anything encouraging that came to mind. There had been days when he had been so tempted to just pack up a bag for him and Sam and just leave, he never did though.

When he saw Sam crying his frown deepened. It had been a rough few months, especially on Sam but Dean was only know seeing the mental toll it had taken. He ran his hand through Sam’s hair a few more times, something that had always calmed him down when he was younger.

“You think we can get you set up in the Impala? Gonna drive down to Bobby’s cabin today and just focus on nothing but us, ok? You think you can manage that, if not we’ll stay here til you can, yeah?” Dean felt like he was talking to a younger Sam. He, too, knew that the connection him and Sam shared was deeper than most siblings but Dean knew most siblings never had to play mom/dad to their kid brother the way he had had to. Not that he ever resented that, he’d do anything for Sammy and everyone, supernatural beings and people alike, knew that.

He felt Sam shake his head and hummed out a tune of one of the songs that had been playing on the radio last night. If Sammy needed to take a while out of their day to center himself than Dean would happily sit with him and help him through it. Once they got to the cabin it would be easier for Dean to focus his energy on Sam, whereas right now half his attention was taken by listening and watching for any signs of angels, demons and anything in between. Bobby’s cabins were safe and warded. 

-

-

-

It had taken a few hours until Sam had the energy to turn his head to look up at Dean rather than staring at the blank wall in front of them. Dean smiled down at him but it didn’t reach his eyes, he was worried about Sam. Whilst Sam felt guilty he was adding on more stress to the already mountainous pile Dean was carrying, he couldn’t help but smile softly at the fact his brother still cared about him enough to just sit with him. Usually they’d avoid anything remotely to do with feelings, anything Dean deemed a ‘chick flick moment’, but sometimes they both needed this, even if Dean didn’t admit that to anyone but himself.

“You feeling any better buddy?” The small smile remained as he nodded, he wasn’t in the mood to speak but that was ok because Dean knew what he was thinking and what he needed better than Sam himself did.

“Think you can make it to the car? Cabin’s about a five, six hour drive out so we should make it before night time.” Sam nodded again but made no move to get up causing Dean to grin and smack him playfully on the arm. 

Once Sam was up, he felt too tall. All he wanted to do was lay back down in Dean’s, pretend he was a child again and let Dean take care of everything but he couldn’t because Dean needed him to at least get to the car. He stood awkwardly, fidgeting with his shirt, watching Dean pick up the bag and any other bits they’d brought in.

Dean turned to look at Sam and felt his heart clench. Sam looked pathetic stood there, like he was ready to fall apart and only Dean could glue the pieces together. He took pity on Sam and wrapped an arm around him before leading him out of the motel room and over to the passenger side of the car. Opening the door, he helped Sam into the car before shoving the bag into the boot. He paused at the back of the car, he couldn’t help but wonder about Sam’s behaviour, it had been a bad few months but he didn’t expect this to be Sam’s reaction to it ending. Maybe he just needed to process everything.

With that he slammed the boot down and got into the driver’s seat, noticing that Sam was sitting close than usual. Hey, if it made his brother feel better who was he to say anything. 


	2. Hold Me Closer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean gets Sam to eat and they finally arrive at Bobby's cabin.

Two hours or so into the drive Sam ended up falling asleep. It looked uncomfortable but anytime Dean tried to shift and adjust, his brother whined in his sleep and cuddled further into him. Sam was slumped over so that his head was resting on Dean’s arm, his body still upright and Dean winced at the muscle pain Sam was going to get. Eventually though Sam did lean further over so that his neck didn’t look like it was about to break, now he was resting most of his body weight against Dean, who shrugged and smiled.

He turned the music that was playing down a small bit, not that it was playing loudly to begin with but Sam needed sleep. The whole Lucifer-Michael apocalypse had drained them both, Sam more than Dean by the looks of things. It was his job now to make sure that Sam recovered and didn’t do anything stupid, he was going to look after his little brother. He was sure that Sam would fuss and moan about it but it was something that they both needed at this point, Dean needed to feel needed by Sam and Sam needed to be looked after by Dean. 

It was about four hours into the drive when Dean’s phone started ringing, causing him to curse. He fished the phone out of his pocket without moving too much so not to awaken Sam. 

“Hey Bobby.” He answered quietly.

“Dean, you boys OK? Haven’t heard from you all day, thought you’d be at the cabin now?” Bobby asked gruffly. As much as he wanted the boys to come home with him, he knew they needed each other now and was just grateful they were taking a break. Things could’ve ended so much more badly had Sam not expelled Lucifer at the right time, sending him right to Hell with his brother. 

“Nah, not yet. Sam had a rough start so we stayed at the motel a bit longer. Got another hour and a half, maybe two hours left to go.” Dean smiled at Bobby’s concern for them, once him and Sam had gotten better they were definitely spending more time with Bobby. Screw hunting a while, there were other hunters who could deal with the smaller threats and with Bobby running the show he knew they were safe for a while.

“Poor kid. The both of ya need to relax now. Don’t even think about huntin’ at the minute.” Dean felt himself snort as he assured Bobby that the pair of them were temporarily retiring from hunting. They’d done enough to save the damn world five times over. 

Once he finished up with Bobby, he threw the phone done on the dashboard and let out a sigh. He knew he should stop for food, Sam hadn’t eaten anything for a few days now and he himself was no better. The thought of waking Sam up made him feel guilty but he knew he had to prioritise his brother’s needs and food was definitely above sleep at this moment in time. Still, he wouldn’t wake him just yet, he could wait until they got to a diner, or hey better yet, maybe he’d just go through a drive thru. 

****   
  


-

-

****   
  


-

****   
  


As much as Dean knew Sam needed proper food in him there wasn’t much he could do when they were in the middle of nowhere with only a few service stations miles away from each other. He pulled through the drive thru for McDonald’s, his stomach growling at the smell of food. 

Once he’d been handed the food he drove into an empty car park space and turned to Sam.

“Hey Sammy,” he said, knowing his voice was too quiet, too soft, to break through the barriers of sleep. With a guilty sigh he raised his voice slightly to normal speaking levels and gave Sam a gentle shake, “hey Sammy, rise and shine, buddy.”

Sam groaned and tried to bury himself further into Dean, head now resting happily on his brother’s chest. Dean just rolled his eyes and shook him again until Sam sat up and looked at him with a pout. 

“Sorry, little brother, but you gotta eat.” Dean couldn’t stop the frown that pulled at his lips, Sam looked drained, like he didn’t even have the energy to hold his own body up, yet alone be conscious and eat. The exhaustion was clear on his face making him look both older and younger than he was, though the younger Sam that was shining through was amplified by his actions. 

“Don’t wanna.” Sam mumbled before trying to lay back down against Dean. As much as he wanted to let his little brother sleep, he knew he had to eat.

“Sorry Sam, I promise I’ll let you sleep as long as you like after you get some food in you.” Sam shook his head, eyes looking suspiciously wet.

Dean thought back to when Sam was a kid, remembering a time when Sam was the fussiest eater, which was the worst thing when your dad only left you with pasta, Cheerios, butter and bread. He’d had to feed Sam himself before the damn kid would eat anything. Maybe it’d work now? Sure Sam would pitch a fit at being treated like a baby when he was more conscious but for now, it could work.

“Alright buddy, it’s ok. Let’s just eat a few fries, yeah?” Dean watched as Sam stubbornly shook his head, a smile coming onto his face as he rummaged in the bag and pulled out a handful of fries. He ate one first, if Dean did something chances are Sam would want to, it’s how younger Sam was anyway. 

He held one fry against Sam’s lips, chuckling at the way he clenched his jaw. It only took a few attempts and promises of sleep before Sam opened his mouth the smallest bit and Dean was able to feed him. 

It went on like that until all the fries were gone, Dean eating one then feeding one to Sam. He’d tried to get Sam to feed himself but laughed and stopped when he received a death glare. There was two burgers in the bag but Dean wasn’t going to force Sam to eat that, not when the kid looked like he was going to drop. He’d already starting drifting off and snapping back into wakefulness as he was eating the last of the fries. He took one burger out as Sam got himself settled against Dean again before he took a bite and started driving.

-

-

-

_ Finally.  _ They had made it to Bobby’s cabin at around seven at night, not too late but he still felt the exhaustion deep in his bones. All his muscles ached and the thought of carrying all their bags in made him groan. Maybe that could wait until tomorrow.

“Hey Sam, we’re here.” He said and he gently shook Sam awake. Sam let out a groan but sat up and looked at Dean. He still looked like shit for someone who had slept for most of the day but Dean knew it’d take longer than one car drive to fix the mess Lucifer, Michael and the other angels had caused. Dean couldn’t help but frown when he looked at Sam though, the poor kid looked so lost.

“C’mon let’s go.” His back ached as he climbed out of the car but he ignored it. Making his way to the boot, he picked up his and Sam’s bag so they had toiletries and a change of clothing but left the rest.

When he went around to Sam’s side of the car he saw his brother was still sat in his seat, looking like he was going to break any second. If Lucifer and Michael weren’t in Hell, he’d find a way to kill them. Swinging the bags onto his shoulder, he leaned down and opened the door for Sam, usually there would be a sarcastic remark to follow but he really was too worried about his brother.

“Alright, Sammy, let’s go.” Sam finally got out of the car and hovered closer than usual to Dean, seems like he was going to have his brother clinging to him for the unforeseeable future, not that he minded of course. As far as Dean was concerned Sam was safest when he was with him. 

He told Sam he was just going to shower before bed, feeling bad when he saw him get that lost look in his eyes. He showed Sam the bedroom that was going to be his whilst they were here and told him to get as much rest as he could before he left him.

The shower did him wonders to relieve the ache in his bones but did nothing to help the worried feeling that had weighed on him since the motel. The only thing he could do was what he did best, look after Sammy. If that meant he had to give up hunting forever and hid out in the woods in a cozy cabin then he’d happily do that. 

Quickly, Dean threw on some sweats and a white t-shirt before towelling his hair dry. He froze as he entered his room and saw Sam in his bed, blanket wrapped under his chin so Dean could still see his face.

“Hey buddy. What you doin’ in here?” He wasn’t expecting much of an answer, of course, he’d noticed that Sam had been pretty much non verbal for most of the day but he always could read Sam better than anyone. 

“Want you.” Sam mumbled, so quietly it took Dean a moment to realise he had spoken.

“You want me?” He asked, just to be sure. Smiling when Sam nodded yes.

“Alright then Sammy. Let’s go to sleep then, yeah, I’m exhausted.” Sam smiled as Dean let out an overly dramatic yawn. 

Dean made sure everywhere was locked and salted before he climbed into bed with Sam, who immediately cuddled in close to Dean. Dean thought with the height difference that having Sam cuddle into him like this would feel awkward but it was comfortable, he felt better knowing his brother was in his arms, safe and well protected.

Sam melted at the contact. This was exactly what he needed after everything. He needed to just let Dean be big brother and take the reins completely. He needed Dean to look after him and hold him close and run his fingers through his hair, just like that. Sam felt like a kid again, before he knew about monsters and what the family business was, he felt oblivious to it all. Sure in the very back of his mind he knew but he also knew nothing could get him, knew Dean would take care of any threats, whilst taking care of Sam. 

“Go to sleep Sammy.” Hearing the soft command, Sam turned to smile up at Dean, who immediately returned it, and did as he was told. Drifting off into a peaceful sleep, free off nightmares thanks to Dean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. Age play to come!x


	3. Everyday You're Here, I'm Healing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait, I've had so much uni work! I promise I'll try and aim for more regular updates because I'm so excited for this book! If you have any ideas/anything you want to see let me know.  
Age play coming soon, I promise!!
> 
> Enjoy:)x

Sleeping with his six-foot four brother turned out to be comfier than he had expected. Though Dean found himself waking up repeatedly throughout the night it was never because of nightmares, only to check on his little brother who was curled up against his chest, a hand scrunching Dean’s shirt tightly. 

Morning came and Dean woke up to see Sam awake, sitting up and twisting his fingers together nervously. The younger brother was so focused on whatever was going on inside his head that he hadn’t noticed Dean was awake and looking at him with concerned and curious eyes. 

Too caught up in his own thoughts of how he was being too obvious, being too stupid, Sam missed Dean sitting up and calling his name. What was he thinking, climbing into Dean’s bed with him, not even giving Dean a choice, but he couldn’t sleep alone. Even just the thought of being away from Dean, for even a minute, made him want to tear up and hold Dean like he was his only life line.

“‘-Ammy!” Sam jumped when Dean shouted his name, finally breaking through whatever had his brother so focused. “I’ve been trying to get your attention for ages. What’s up?” Dean asked, the concerned look only worsening as he took in Sam’s pale face and scared look.

Sam just shook his head. Things were better now, Lucifer and Michael were gone, everything should be better, so why was Sam still feeling like the world was going to fall apart? He didn’t want to do it anymore, he hadn’t wanted to hunt in the first place, coming back because Dean had wanted him and he missed his brother. Returning back to a normal life was out of the question. Sam just wanted his brother; he didn’t care about anything else.

“Come on, Sammy, talk to me. Tell me what’s goin’ on in that head of yours.” Dean prompted, sitting up and wrapping an arm around Sam, pulling the kid closer to him. He frowned when he felt Sam tense up momentarily before relaxing into Dean.

“Can’t.” Sam mumbled into Dean’s shoulder. Even if he wanted to, which he definitely didn’t, he wouldn’t know where to begin. 

“Yes, you can kiddo. Come on, let’s start with something easy, how’re you feeling?” Sam had to hand it to Dean, he was being more patient than usual.

“Scared.” Dean just about caught the whispered word, eyes widening in sympathy for his little brother. He wished he could just rid Sam of the pain and all the bad that had happened to him with a magic word, but he couldn’t, he could be there for him though.

“You’re scared, huh buddy? Wanna know a secret?” Dean whispered, being sure to keep his tone lighthearted, “I get scared too but we did good, we stopped the bad guys and now, now it’s just me and you. You ain’t got nothing to be scared off, I’ll look after you.” Dean couldn’t help the grin that appeared on his face at the look of bewilderment Sam was giving him when he admitted he was scared; it was cute he could admit that. He was struck by how easy and familiar it was to take care of Sam, he really was like the kid Dean remembered. 

“Come on, I don’t know about you but I’m starving.” Dean moaned as he pushed himself off of the bed and gestured for Sam to follow him into the kitchen.

-

-

-

Getting Sam to eat was much easier this time around and breakfast was finished quickly enough. Dean made sure he called Bobby to let them know they were here and safe, though he did get an earful for not calling when they actually arrived.

“Man, I didn’t realise how much we needed a break.” Dean groaned as he threw himself on the sofa, stretching to reach the remote that sat on the coffee table. He looked over at Sam, who had sat himself onto the sofa next to Dean, and held the remote in his direction causing Sam to shake his head. Dean shrugged before flipping to a channel that was playing reruns of Doctor Sexy.

“How you doin’, Sammy?” Dean asked after a few episodes had passed in silence, the occasional comment from Dean aimed at the TV.

Sam looked up at Dean, pondering the question. He felt like crap in all honesty. Sure the archangels were locked away with little hope of escaping which hopefully meant the rest of the angels would just leave them be and sure they were finally taking a break from hunting but he just felt…bad, almost empty.

It wasn’t just because of the strange headspace he found himself slipping into, hell he wished that was the beginning and end of his problems. Something about the whole Lucifer and him being connected really got to him, obviously it would but was Sam capable of being like Lucifer? Hell, he’d drunk the demon blood willingly, let Dean down more times than he could count, why Dean stuck around Sam didn’t understand some days but he was grateful for him.

“Sam?” Dean prompted after a few minutes of silence; where it was obvious Sam was getting lost in his own thoughts. 

Sam shook his head slightly before shrugging with a frown on his face. He knew Dean would get sick of the whole nonverbal communication at some point but Sam just didn’t have the energy to try.

“Yeah, I get it, I mean the apocalypse, Lucifer and Michael. God, remember when we still thought demons were our biggest problem?” Dean chuckled, smiling wide when Sam let out a breath of a laugh. “But man, I’m worried about you. It’s been a lot and you know I don’t do chick flick moments but whilst we’re here, whilst we’re attempting something close to normalcy, I’m here ok? Anything you wanna talk about, I’ll listen.” Dean watched as Sam clenched his eyes shut and allowed himself to sit up and wrap an arm around his little brother, tugging him close.

“Thank you.” Sam whispered; voice rough from not being used. Dean had to strain again to hear it but it brought a smile to his face.

“Never gotta thank me, little brother, never.” Dean assured, squeezing Sam tight.

-

-

-

The two Winchesters settled into a somewhat normal routine. They’d been at Bobby’s cabin for a week now and Sam was mostly still silent but Dean always knew what he wanted to say. The pair had shared Dean’s bed every night, Sam giving Dean an apologetic but thankful smile which Dean rolled his eyes at every time. They'd gotten use to letting themselves sleep in and Dean got acquainted with the kitchen and discovered he was a rather good cook, always fluttering around the kitchen making a delicious meal for him and Sam. Sam never strayed too far from his brother and Dean was thankful to have his brother so dependent on him again. With all the fights and arguments caused during the last few years it was nice to just be with each other. 

Sam was still dealing with the need to be looked after and Dean wasn’t helping. Dean had been taking care of Sam since they’d arrived and Sam wanted more, he felt selfish but he couldn’t deny it. Sometimes in those moments were he woke up drenched in sweat after a nightmare where he was in the cage too, when Dean held him and whispered that he was safe, that Lucifer couldn’t hurt him anymore, he wanted to tell, wanted to beg, Dean to take over, to look after him. He didn’t want to do anything by himself, he made bad decisions and was drained. But he didn’t. Somehow, he refrained from saying anything, he held his tongue and felt himself becoming more drained as the days passed.

Dean had noticed something was wrong. Something that he couldn’t fully blame Lucifer and the angels for and it was killing him, something was wrong with Sam and he couldn’t figure it out. No amount of prompting was getting him closer to an answer. 

-

-

-

“I don’t know what to do, Bobby.” Dean said into the phone. He was sat on the porch late at night when Sam had drifted off to sleep. They’d been at the cabin for two weeks and Sam wasn’t doing much better. It killed him to not know what was wrong.

“Come on now, son, you know that kid better than anyone else, just gotta talk to him, none of that half-arsed crap either, you gotta be direct.” Bobby advised causing Dean to sigh, of course he knew what he had to do but he didn’t want to risk messing up what they had and Bobby knew as much.

“Whatever’s eating at the kid clearly ain’t solving itself, maybe things do take a turn for the worst but least then you’ll have half a clue what you’re dealing with.” The pair spoke for a few minutes longer before Dean thanked Bobby and hung up with a promise to call him soon. 

Dean stayed on the porch for a long while before he turned to go back inside. He knew he had to talk to Sam but he couldn’t deny he was scared. Bobby was right, nobody knew Sam better than Dean did and the fact he didn’t know what was wrong with Sam without Sam telling him was making him feel like he’d failed his brother.

With a sigh Dean headed into the bedroom and slipped back into bed were Sam instinctively curled into him. 

“De?” Sam asked sleepily, sounding much like he did when he was three and Dean crawled into bed with him when his little brother couldn’t sleep.

“Go to sleep Sammy, I’m here.” He whispered comfortingly, the words pulling up more memories from a childhood that seemed so long ago.

“K, night De.” Sam mumbled, curling up even more to make himself smaller whilst cuddling closer to Dean.

“Night kiddo.” Dean replied absentmindedly, more caught up in his own head.

He’d talk to Sam tomorrow, he promised himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also - Do y'all wanna see Cas in this at some point? Like interacting with Little!Sam or not?


	4. You make me feel like I am home again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am the worst at updating, I am so sorry! 
> 
> But thank you to ereynolds for your ideas, they were so helpful for this chapter!x
> 
> Enjoy y'all!

Over the next few days, the cuddling stopped, Sam still slept in Dean’s bed but he made sure there was as much distance as possible between them. Sam became more restless and whilst he wasn’t talking much anymore, he somehow managed to make his frustrations known. 

Dean was getting easily wound up by Sam’s sudden change in behaviour, the first two weeks at the cabin were great, Sam and Dean were closer than ever but now Sam had completely flipped. Though he was acting up and wanting to be away from Dean that didn’t mean Sam actually gave himself the space he thought he wanted, no he still couldn’t stand to be away from his older brother but he knew he was falling into a bad place mentally and just wanted to be done. He knew Dean wouldn’t react positively to finding out Sam wanted to be a kid again, hell Dean would think he was disgusting and he’d disappointed his big brother so much that he couldn’t do it again.

Dean had gritted his teeth and tried to talk to Sam. The morning after he spoke to Bobby on the porch he spoke to Sam and tried to get him to talk but all it got him were some empty looks, a few shrugs and sighs before he realised, he wasn’t getting an answer. The only thing he could do was be there for Sam and hoped the kid gave up on the attitude and talked it out.

Besides Sam’s drastic mood change things had been good for both of them. They definitely needed a break where it was just the two of them, away from all other people and supernatural creatures. Dean felt a peace he hadn’t felt for years when his only task was to take care of Sam.

Things came to a halt towards the end of their second week at the cabin. So far Sam had only turned the bitch face up more as well as keeping Dean at a distance, the lack of verbal communication had been there since they arrived but there was something about it now that loudly voiced Sam’s frustrations. 

“That’s enough!” Dean snapped as Sam rolled his eyes at the food placed in front of him, that’s another thing that had become a problem. Sam refused to eat anything Dean gave to him and each time it ended with a staring match until Sam caved and ate the bare minimum.

“Now I don’t know what’s going on with you but you’re gonna tell me because I’ve had it with this attitude.” Sam looked at Dean for a moment like he was going to give in and talk but then his features hardened and he shook his head.

“No!” Sam shouted causing Dean’s eyes to narrow in annoyance.

“Yes Sam, start talking. I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.” Again, Sam hesitated for a moment before continuing.

“No! No, no, no, no, no!” He chanted, his frustration becoming more visible as he worked himself up. Sam’s hands came up to the table and he pushed the plate of food, Dean could only watch as the plate smashed and food littered the floor.  
Sam froze, his chanting stopped and his eyes widened as he looked at the mess on the floor, the only thing running through his mind is that Dean was going to be so mad at him. Dean’s annoyance had faded into shock as he looked between Sam and the plate before he snapped into action.

He wrapped his hand around Sam’s wrist, just tightly enough to drag him from the chair but not enough to hurt. 

“Dean, what’re you doing? Get off!” Sam shouted, trying and failing to pull his hand from Dean’s grip.

“No Sam, I don’t know where this attitude is coming from but we don’t act out like that! Now stand there for five minutes whilst I clean up. Don’t even think about moving or it’ll be longer.” Dean warned as he placed Sam in the corner of the room, facing the wall.

Only when he left the room to get a brush did he stop and think about his actions. A memory of something similar invaded his mind, the image of six-year-old Sammy throwing a tantrum, dad had been on a hunt and Dean was in charge. Dean placed Sam in the corner of the room and told him to think about what he’d done and he would come get him. 

It scared Dean a little just how fast he’d took on that role again like it was second nature, he hadn’t even thought about what he was doing. Dean slumped against the wall, letting his head thump against it gently. A lot of Sam’s behaviour and attitude had reminded Dean of his brother when he was a kid but this, this was taking it to a new level. He sighed as his eyes closed, God he’d messed up. Sam was going to be mad at him.

Back in the kitchen Sam still stood facing the wall, tears slipping down his face as he gasped for a breath. He hadn’t meant to push the plate off of the table, he was just annoyed, he didn’t want to eat that and now Dean was mad at him and he was in time out. Sam let himself fall to the floor and he pulled his knees up so he could bury his face in them as the tears continued. Dean was going to hate him now and send him away.

-

-

-

Dean stayed in the hallway for a few more minutes before deciding he had to go and face Sam and the argument that was no doubt waiting for him. Hell, Dean was expecting a punch or something from the moment he entered the kitchen so he was thoroughly shocked when he saw Sam curled in on himself, still in the corner of the room, letting out a steady stream of quiet sobs. 

Immediately Dean was crouched down next to Sam, this image also familiar to him though it seemed to be from a life time ago.

  
“Hey, Sammy, what’s up?” He asked gently, reaching out and rubbing a hand reassuringly up and down Sam’s back.

“D-De, sorry, so so sorry, didn’t mean to be bad De.” Sam rushed out, looking up at Dean who looked even more concerned as he saw the tears streaming down his little brother’s face. “Don’t be mad, I’m sorry!” 

“Whoa, Sammy it’s ok, calm down. Come on now, deep breaths for me, copy me.” With that Dean began breathing deeply, prompting Sam a few more times before he started copying Dean and steadily became calmer.

“Good job,” Dean smiled, ruffling Sam’s hair as he did, “wanna tell me what’s going on now?” 

“No thank you.” Sam said quietly, letting himself relax by leaning into Dean’s chest to which Dean did nothing more than shift to accommodate Sam relaxing his entire weight on to him. He couldn’t help but smile down at Sam who looked more relaxed than he had in a long time.

“As polite as that was, it wasn’t really a question. You’ve gotta tell me what’s going on now because I’m worried about you.” Sam looked up at Dean with those eyes that made his heart ache, though the tears had stopped his eyes were red and watery and Dean would do anything to see Sam happy.

“Don’t like it.” Sam mumbled into Dean’s chest, shifting his face so he didn’t have to look at his brother. He knew he’d slipped during his tantrum and time out but he still had enough control to be embarrassed. 

“You don’t like what Sammy?”

“Don’t like being big, hate it, s’not nice, not good. Like you, you’re good.” Sam’s mumbled broken sentences caused Dean’s confusion to grow even more. Sam didn’t like being big? What the hell did that mean? 

“What’d you mean? Being big?” He asked gently, brushing some stray hair from Sam’s face as he did.

Sam leaned into the touch, shaking his head slightly. He didn’t want to have this conversation, he just wanted Dean to know but that wasn’t fair. Dean knew most everything about Sam but even he couldn’t guess at what Sam was saying.

“Being big!” Sam breathed out, frustration building again and Dean started to rub his hand up and down Sam’s arm, taking deep, exaggerated breaths causing Sam to copy almost automatically.

“Alright Sammy, calm down, we’ll figure it out, ok? Just, just try and explain it to me, yeah?” Dean prompted once Sam had calmed himself. He felt so far out of his depth right now but whatever Sam was trying to tell him had clearly been weighing on him for quite some time.   
“‘Kay Dean. Don’t like being big, can’t do things myself, it’s scary and m’tired. Want you to do it, just wanna be little, Dean. Want you to make it better, you always have but want more.” Sam explained the best he could but he didn’t know how to get the words that seemed to make sense in his head out of his mouth. It was hard.

Dean looked down at Sam, his eyebrows pinched together and his mouth moving but no words came out. Sam wanted to be little? What did that mean? He wanted Dean to make everything better, to do things for him? Little as in a little kid, of course he had noted that Sam had been adopting more of kid Sam’s mannerisms but for him to want to be a little kid again, for Dean to look after him? It wasn’t what Dean was expecting, if he was right at all that is.

“Little?” Dean asked softly, “Like a little kid?” Before Dean could continue, he was cut off by Sam nodding his head and looking up at Dean with that puppy dog look that would make just about anyone do whatever Sam wanted. 

Sam wanted to be a little kid again. Dean couldn’t blame him; Sam’s adult life hadn’t exactly been the best but then again neither had the kid’s childhood. Sure, Dean tried his best to make it better, to make sure Sam had at least a few happy memories but it wasn’t great. He supposed he understood it though, not fully, but he got it. After having almost every decision you made turn up wrong, well it had to weigh down on a person even if it wasn’t Sam’s fault. 

He knew he had to give Sam some indication to how he felt otherwise Sam would assume the worst and they’d be back to where they started. He needed a bit of time though, that’s all. When faced with something he didn’t know much about him and Sam would research it until they had a better idea of what they were dealing with. Dean just needed to research.

“Listen Sammy, that’s ok. Hell, I even understand it a bit but we aren’t jumping into anything. We need to talk about it when you’re not feeling so upset, yeah?” He asked which caused Sam to freeze but after a minute or two he nodded against Dean’s chest, he understood that, he didn’t like it but he understood it. “Good, we can talk about it in the morning, I promise, but right now you gotta eat and then we’ll go to bed.”

-

-

-

Dean cleaned up the mess after Sam had settled down and actually began to eat. He was already thinking about what he was going to say tomorrow but had to keep stopping himself. After Sam was asleep, he could pull his laptop out and try and understand.

“I’m done De.” Sam told him quietly, at least one good thing had happened so far out of this, Sam was actually talking more than he had for a while.

“Good job, you go brush your teeth and get ready for bed and I’ll be up in a sec.” With that Sam left to go do what Dean had told him whilst Dean washed the dishes.

Before long both Sam and Dean were settled in Dean’s bed, an arrangement that had continued since their first night in the cabin. Sam looked exhausted but kept fighting sleep. With a quiet sigh Dean reached over and pulled his younger brother closer, gently carding his fingers through the mess of hair.

“Go to sleep, Sammy.” Dean whispered.

“‘Kay Dean.” Sam settled down, relaxing against Dean and just when Dean thought he was asleep and went to reach for the laptop Sam spoke up.

“Do you hate me now?” He sounded more coherent than he had during their conversation in the kitchen but still drained.

“Course not, nothing you say could make me hate you. Now go to sleep, I promise we’ll talk in the morning.” Dean assured him, he felt Sam nod into his chest before his hand was gripping Dean’s shirt tightly.

“Night De.” 

“Goodnight Sammy.”

-

-

-

Dean lay there for a few hours, making sure Sam was ok and deeply asleep before he sat up. He shifted Sam before pulling the laptop onto his lap and turned the brightness down. _Right_, Dean thought to himself, _where to start._

It only took Dean a few searches before he came across the term ‘Age Play’. He scrunched his nose when he read a section on sexual age play, sure he and Sam where close but that was just wrong. He knew, or at least prayed, that this wasn’t all there was to it, that Sam didn’t expect _that_.

Eventually he came across a website on non-sexual age play and was filled with relief, this he could deal with.

_‘Portraying any age can be the goal of age play, from babies to a child to the elderly. Usually this involves someone pretending to be younger than they actually are.’_

_‘I’ve been little for such a long time now, honestly it makes me feel so free!’_

  
_‘It's always a good idea to establish boundaries in any relationship whether it has sexual elements or not, just so both of you know where the other stands on things. Rules are important and can help both the little and guardian.’_

_‘Age play is a type of role-play in which one or more partners acts as though they are a different age than they really are. Props and clothing - such as ruffled dresses, diapers, children's toys and even cribs - may be used during age play, and this fetish can be sexual or non-sexual.’_

_‘Individuals that assume the roles of children find comfort in this form of role playing because they get to express their childish feelings and relinquish their responsibility to another person. The age players who assume the role of the older partner get the satisfaction of teaching, caring for and comforting their "younger" partner. Overall, age play relationships are very warm, comfortable and fulfilling for all parties involved.’_

_‘Little space is a state of pleasant regression, wherein your responsibilities, worries, stress, and overall negative emotions melt away and are replaced by the feeling of being young, playful and vulnerable.’_

Dean read for most of the night and even ended up on a few websites that catered clothing and props towards age playing. After reading about the non-sexual elements he had to admit, if only to himself for now, that he was intrigued. He’d get to look after Sam again more openly, Sam would get the chance to just let go and not have to worry about anything and they’d both relax a bit more. 

Now that they weren’t hunting, it was perfect. Sam wouldn’t have to be on edge when he was in his ‘little space’ in case he had to age up quickly because of a hunt. They were alone out here, no one to disturb them. 

He considered the pros and cons of doing this but couldn’t help but think of pointless things like how cute Sam would look in a moose onesie that he had found on one of the store links and definitely did not bookmark for later. 

He knew what his decision would be the moment Sam looked at him with those puppy dog eyes of his but after researching and reading about people’s actual experience and how much good it did them, well that was all a comforting bonus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I say it all the time but I'll try to update soon, I'm off uni for a week with no work so I have time! 
> 
> Also if you guys have anything you want to see in this let me know!x


End file.
